That one moment

I had a very touching conversation with a school teacher just now. I told him how angry I was that my good intention and my work was being opposed by people who didn't understand it. I told him how I am looking for other villages to continue my work and he stopped me. He said:

"Please don't do that. You have given me so much knowledge on how to become a good teacher. I have changed myself so much in the last year because of you. Whatever feedback you give me, I take it so seriously. I am a changed person now and you can ask the students. And I feel that the students connect more with me now. I am like their friend. Even if one person is inspired by your TEDxShekhavati event, then your event is worth it. It will take ages to change this society because they resist change out of fear. But don't cancel your TEDx event. Do it just for me if you have to. But know that many people are touched by your work, your courage."

And then...you are left speechless. There's not much to say. Maybe a but of guilt feeling that I was getting carried away in my anger. The human in me starts showing its side somedays.

 

- Blogging from Fatehpur Shekhavati, Rajasthan (India)

Sad realizations

Last night I had a very sad realization.

I was called by the Head of our community people in Dubai to come for a meeting (today) with my Dad. No one told me anything but when I reached home, I found out.

They have refused to let me host TEDxShekhavati in the village school. It really crushed me, especially as I witnessed the furore. They reached a point where they started picking faults in my 8-Day Academy work and the small library that I had started for them. One fault: "In the books she gave us, there was the word God'. Erm yes, that's offensive because it should read 'Allah' universally and not 'God'. More than getting angry, it amused me endless.

But then, my parents were very upset over how everything backfired on me. Mom was angry at me and I thought Dad was too.I'll face anyone outside but I don't like confrontations at home. I was very touched and once again, grateful to my father who spoke to me very calmly and asked me: Does this TEDxShekhavati really need to be done? I replied: Yes. And he said he would support me. It meant a lot for him to support this cause--to be open-minded enough to do so.

I told my parents that TEDxShekhavati will be done, no matter what. I am so sick of this backward thinking, so so sick of it. I was being constantly told that 'Look at how ungrateful people are despite your efforts. So, there's no need to do this anymore.'

But I remembered the faces of all the people I have taught and worked with and I knew that was not true. Sadly, I realized that my people were miserable not because they were lazy or illiterate, but because of the wrong leadership. If this blog post catches their eye, it will lead to shunning me completely, but I don't care. Playing by such ridiculous rules and abiding by nonsense makes me equally guilty. I won't endorse this; it has to end somewhere and somehow.

So, instead of 400, even if it means to have TEDxShekhavati with 50 people, I will do it. There's a reason I want this to come to Fatehpur--precisely the same reason that people are refusing it. I am really very sad for my people and I know I have to now look for other villages to work in.

On January 19, 2010 I know that TEDxShekhavati will happen but I still don't know where and what different drama will happen in this 1.5 months.

Thank you so much for your support, I really appreciate it. Beyond words.

Incomplete permissions

Since I will be in India in Jan 2010 not just for TEDxShekhavati, but also to do my 8-Day Academy, both my initiatives needed 'permission'. Today, my 8-Day Academy sessions got approved (we'll be teaching creative thinking, Spreadsheet software etc).

But TEDxShekhavati is still not approved. The Heads are concerned that 'as a girl, people might not accept me organising a conference'. I find it absolutely ridiculous but he reminded me that all good work is met by criticism and rejection in Fatehpur. I understand what he means but just because something is wrong, doesn't mean that we accept it. The fact that we accept it makes us a part of the problem.

They have made a committee to see if TEDxShekhavati should be allowed. I am meeting them tomorrow evening to discuss. Fingers crossed. I think I'll have to make changes to the program a little bit. The first bit that I see being removed is a 10-minutes performance by the Langa musicians of Rajasthan. I am heart-broken about it because I am so proud of their work and I wanted to showcase their work as an integral part of Rajasthani heritage. I guess I have to pick my battles and maybe I can fight for the musicians some other time. I wouldn't risk the entire conference for a 10-minute music performance.

Gotta do what you gotta do.

The Brick Wall

Today, I sadly reminded myself that rural people aren't poor because it's difficult to get services to them, but it's also because they themselves resist it.

Of course, it's not a generalisation but for all the people who are working on ground trying to make others' lives better, will tell you how it was difficult to help. Nobody wanted it. Since the time I started the 8-Day Academy, I faced such resistance. Nobody seemed to be happy for what I was doing. Many didn't care; they thought I was doing this as my annual 'charity' act.

You might wonder where this post is trying to say. Today, I hit my lows once again. I was told to 'cancel' TEDxShekhavati because 'it's a hassle and no one needs it'. Apparently, I am 'running behind people who don't even care about me'. Today, the Community Heads are meeting to discuss whether TEDxShekhavati should be allowed or not. How pitiful.

A friend on Twitter told me to move the TEDx to another village.

But, I don't want to. This was the whole point. I wanted to bring enlightenment and ideas for this very reason to this village/town. I was sad for an hour but now I'm trying to think of all back-up plans. I am also stubborn I want to have it here. I am not organising TEDxShekhavati for some kind of name or prestige; I am doing it because Fatehpur needs it. I am doing it for the people.

I know that the next month will be an uphill struggle with unforeseen problems but I will be stubborn because I want to change this backward thinking. As a girl in 'burkha' in a place where character assassination is the easiest because of my gender, I am even ready to stand in front of all the men who are the Village Committee and argue/debate if I have to.

TEDxShekhavati has to happen.

When the revolution was born

When I was speaking at TEDxDubai, it was the closest I had gotten to being on a 'TED stage'. But I've been taught to respect and value every small opportunity and to me, since I started the 8-Day Academy, this platform would be the largest audience I'd ever spoke to: 900 people! That day (Oct 10, 2009) became a blur of positivity, tears of joy, inspiration and an endless push to do great things!

I had a chat with James [Piecowye] who was also the Co-Curator of TEDxDubai and told him that I had a crazy idea. I wanted to bring TED to my village! As 'glamorous' as it sounds, it was a very hard task and both of us understood that. James has been a mentor to me--he has always supported me and encouraged me to push the boundaries for a cause that is worth it. So, I created 'TEDxShekhavati'.

Why 'Shekhavati'?

I am the Chief Actionista (a.k.a Founder) of the 8-Day Academy, which is my initiative of giving functional education to villages and communities in just eight days! Coming from a conservative family background, I did not have the luxury to travel wherever and whenever I wanted. So, the most natural place for me to choose for social change was my own village--which in actuality, is a town. The population has boomed but the infrastructure remains pitiful. Those who can leave the village have left and those who can't (for many reasons) have accepted it and live with it. This town is called Fatehpur Shekhawati which is in Sikar, Rajasthan. Now, just like you have many cities called 'Rome' (in Europe and the US!), there are many towns called 'Fatehpur', especially people mistake it as Fatehpur Sikri which is in Agra! So, I decided to name the TEDx after the region my town falls under: Shekhawati. It has other towns and villages in it such as Jhunjhunu, Churu, Mandawa, Nawalgarh etc.

We came up with the tagline: IDEA REVOLUTION!

I don't care about having big names or some superstars endorse this event. I want an honest event which gives us a message that moves people. Everyone tells me that I am 'stupid' because 'no one cares about TED or knows anything about it' in this region. But having faced mutations of this statement many times in life, I am immune to it and it doesn't deter me. I want every villager...every attendee to have ONE idea that they stand for, that they believe in. Any and every change starts with an idea.

The speakers have been chosen as small town and village people who have made it big in life using a simple theory: idea + education. That's all it takes! James and I wanted to pick people from different areas who would cater to different interests and relevance to people in villages and small towns, who they can connect to. So we have everyone from photography, sports, education, social entrepreneurship, heritage, health, human rights, environment and others (which we are still in the process of confirming)!

There are many other bits and bobs that we're working on and that make this whole journey so exciting and humbling. As the day passes, I'll be updating the blog and sharing them with you. I'm hoping we have Internet connection on the day of the event so we can Live blog; but there will be Live tweets!

A shout-out to Lara Stein and Salome Heusel of the TEDx team who have been so supportive and patient throughout. Good people inspire us to do greater things in kind ways.

Follow us on Twitter @TEDxShekhavati

Our web will be uploaded by this week, do bookmark: www.tedxshekhavati.com - Msg us if you want to be involved with this event.

January 19, 2010 is the date!